If I had to describe my run this morning I would say it was an "awakening." Because I have run so many ultra races in the past two months, my speed has taken a beating as a result. When I ran with Ken he pushed it a little faster today than I was expecting and even asked me when my last tempo run was. I joked to him that it was probably over a year ago.
I've been going into each race with the mentality of just finishing. I've been fortunate that I've done well with this philosophy but it is the best that I could have done? I really would have to say no. I've been leaving something on the race courses and it has started to bother me.
It's a fine line, for me, between running "smart" and running "safe" and I think I've been running more "safe" lately. Sometimes it takes the help of a friend to remind you of where you were and what you are capable of and that happened today for me. I have to start bridging the gap between running safely and smartly and that will start this Saturday in Niagara Falls.
I enjoy pushing myself to new limits and I'm driven to accomplish new goals. It used to be enough for me just to say that I have completed a race and that's what I've done for the last few races I've done. Sometimes the fear of the unknown makes us cautious in our approach to things. I truly believe, though, that to do my best, I need to let go of the fear that I have and just push myself through those pain barriers. I know that if I'm not feeling pain after this Saturday, then I would not have pushed myself as hard as I should have.
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